Relax, I am joking!!

It was the first day in college! Ramya was anxious to make the day a hit. She has always been the center of attraction and common talk among the boys in school; which she really cherished! Now, she has a better platform to attract greater number of bees to glance at her sweet-as-honey face. She took all care in getting ready. Her blue slim-fit jeans complimented her yellow top. She put on a transparent necklace and a broad brown belt to give her outfit the perfect dazzle. As she walked out of her house tip-toeing on her high heeled sandals and a green bag slung around her shoulder with a branded pair of glares to add the correct shade, one could hear the heart beats of all ogling eyes on the street! But, Ramya never bothered since she has now got accustomed to such background scores of thumping hearts playing when she walks on the road!!

Entering college, her efforts paid back, everyone looked at her. No one could stop themselves from looking at her at least once, though the feelings of looking was different across every heart. The girls looked enviously realizing that they stand nowhere in the competition and the boys stared with an expectation in their eyes that someday she would be walking beside them.

As they say, hopes have no boundaries and imaginations fly the highest so even the most inconspicuous boy of the college dreamt about her!

She walked down the aisle of the college with an air of success and a thumping heart of joy that her beauty has been able to conquer a bigger empire- the college.

Ramya entered her classroom and she could read in each of the young man’s eyes an appeal towards her to sit beside them. But, her expert eyes scanned through all and chose a seat beside a young man who was the only person not bothered of looking upto her but found some greater beauty in scribbling something on paper. She got curious and felt a slight anger for the boy because he didn’t give her the importance she expected! The young boy once looked up at her , both exchanged a cordial smile and he again got engrossed in writing. She was not understanding what was more attractive on the paper than her beautiful face. When the class ended, the boy took his belongings and left without even saying a formal goodbye to her. Ramya, could not accept it. She could not accept ignorance of her beauty from a man whom her heart has liked. He was a tall dusky young man with an unkempt look. He looked adorable in his worn-out jeans and T-shirt and a pair of green converse shoes. He walked passed her while drawing his hair away from his forehead and when his fingers made way within his hair strands, he was slowly making way to Ramya’s heart. She was actually struck with his immense power of attraction! This ignorance from the unknown young attractive man continued for Ramya for the next three days. On the fourth day, which was the last day before the first weekend break of college, Ramya made an effort to talk to him. She out of sheer curiosity asked him “excuse me, do you mind letting me know if your are dumb or not” he spoke to her for the first time, “Excuse me, what makes you think so?” Ramya excitedly smiled at him with her eyes sparkling at his heavy deep voice ,”O! my god, you can understand my language, You can see me and You can talk”. The young man kept looking at her blankly, not understanding the reason behind her excitement after discovery of a feature about him which everyone around him knew for the last 21 years! The man exclaimed, “Good, congratulations! You have discovered it”. Ramya felt the sarcasm hitting her hard, so she turned him while he tried to move back and asked him the reason for his ignorance towards her! He looked up at her, smiled and looked down! She felt the smile irritating her to the core, since again the untold silence clouded her all over! She held his T-shirt tightly and asked him again the reason for such a behavior. Ramya, was thunderstruck to hear the reason. The young man said, “Because, I am not your admirer but your would-be husband, “I don’t want to be just a thousand eyes staring at you but I want to be the eye who would keep gazing at you forever”. The words from the man’s mouth fell on her heart like atom bomb fell on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. It ripped her apart and weakened her so much that she could not believe her ears what she heard. She tried to ask him the reason for such a thought! He replied, “I donot look at you as an object of pleasure but as a human being made for me”. The words were launching in Ramya’s heart like launchers on a barren land!

He turned to go, Ramya lifted her hand to stop him. She asked his name. He stopped for a moment to turn and tell her, “Arjun”. Just like Arjun, hit the fish eye and won Draupadi in the swayamvar; this Arjun too won Ramya’s heart amidst the swayamvar! She smiled as her eyes followed him till the end of the corridor.

The next day was a holiday. Ramya, spent the whole of her weekend thinking about Arjun, his deep voice, his attitude, his eyes which was deeper than the ocean, his arms which were strong enough to protect Ramya from any worldly dangers. Ramya, smiled to herself, while she closed her eyes to continue her dream. She felt happy enough to get the man of her life! The man she has always wanted to get as her life partner.

It was Monday morning, Ramya longed to go to college, because she knew she would again get the chance to be with her, Arjun. She went into the class, and as usual made herself comfortable beside Arjun. She looked at him, he glanced at her and again as usual got engrossed in his own writing. She was taken aback by his cold behavior! Anyways, after the class ended she asked Arjun, for going to the canteen, he looked up at her and said “No, why should I?” Ramya, got spell bound for some time. Arjun, again turned and asked her to confirm if she was still thinking about the statement he made earlier last week. When Ramya nodded her head in acceptance! He laughed out hard! He almost started rolling down on the floor laughing. Ramya kept gaping with a dropped jaw as she saw his behavior. He gasped while saying, ”Relax, I was just joking”. Fumes were evidently coming out of Ramya’s ears. She turned red with embarrassment. First time in her life, she has been ridiculed by an opposite sex. She turned and left from college but felt the burning from anger for the rest of the week. She chose to sit with another girl, Jaspreet- from Jalandhar!

But, It seemed as if destiny had something else in store for Ramya. She could never think of spending one single day in college without being before Arjun. First cause was Jaspreet who was head over heels for Arjun (since he incidentally happened to be the coolest and the most attractive man in the class). Arjun, was not only winning for his looks the other qualities in him won him the most popular student in the college. He topped the exams, won dance competitions for the college and also other inter-college competitions were always won by him.

Secretly, for all his qualities and talents, Ramya could not stop her heart from melting for Arjun. She chose to forget the mischief of his and wanted to befriend him. She again went up to him and asked for friendship. He readily accepted it and also cordially apologized for his prank. She smiled and that healed the broken path and their hearts united under the umbrella of friendship. Ramya, secretly kept loving him but he remained aloof and unaware about the loud sound her heart made whenever he was close to her. Her heart craved to feel secure in his arms, her head longed to lean on his strong shoulders. His charming face and childish innocent smile was enough for Ramya to feel refreshed amidst all the pain of not being able to reveal her feelings to him. She slowly became the closest friend for him. But, yes Ramya never wanted this to happen. She never wanted to be the closest friend but the closest person in his life. She wanted to live in his heart and wander within his mind forever! Like, this the three years of graduation passed. Ramya have started knowing Arjun so well, that she never believed what he said. She knew that after every important talk of his, when the listeners gets worried and scared or when they feel sad, exasperated and fumes with anger, his only statement expected is, ”Relax, I am joking!”

Ramya, too never took any of his sayings seriously and whoever took it seriously just approved himself as the biggest fool known to Arjun.

The graduation day was here. Everyone had a divided heart. Firstly, eager with all enthusiasm, hopes and aspirations for their individual’s future and secondly, there was sadness and an emptiness within the leaping young hearts since, they have realized that from now onwards they cannot choose to be away from the unwanted realities of life. They cannot choose to switch on their i-pod and live in their own world they now, have to actually switch it off, for living correctly on the world. The convocation was over. As usual Arjun topped it, but Ramya too had fared well by securing a first division. Ramya, was determined before she puts her first step towards her future she wanted to tell Arjun about her feelings. She approached him, and asked him to meet her in a near-by coffee shop in the evening. But, to her astonishment he refused. He broke the news that he was going to America for his further studies and his flight is in the evening. She as usual did not believe it and was waiting for his old line to uttered, but to her astonishment he revealed the air ticket to approve of his truth. She kept silent. Her heart was screaming within and trying to call out at Arjun and plead him to stay back but he seemed unaware of it. She somehow controlled her eyes from betraying her and flowing out, but the pain in her heart kept increasing. She turned back to wipe her tears and posed to smile for a group photo. He pulled her towards him, she hoped he would have pulled her for the rest of her life. Anyways as they say, fortune is always playing trick and life is a puzzle which always remained unsolved. If you succeed in solving one part of the puzzle the other part becomes unsolved. While, Ramya decided to keep her love locked within her heart forever and walked away from the crowd, Arjun called her. She turned and he said, “By the way, wait for five years, am coming back then we will marry”. She laughed at it. She knew that his jokes are always unbeatable and appears on wrong time of life. Still not letting him realize it she chose to leave.

Apart from being weak for Arjun, Ramya has always been strong in the world. Life is like a sea, it waves of emotions reach the shore and breaks off! The sea keeps rolling and moving forever. Ramya’s life too moved on. She always wished to become a fashion designer. After college, she did the course and within three years time, she found herself in a new city, a new job and to top it all a new love interest! She found a new admirer for her beauty and for herself, in her boss! Ravi, was a very well-behaved established and successful owner of a fashion house and he too could not restrain himself from falling for the beautiful Ramya. She too got attracted towards Ravi, since he was exactly the kind of man any girl would dream of having as a husband! But, there was one feeling which constantly kept Ramya abstain from Ravi- Arjun. She had this certain hope in the lines which Arjun told her while she left. Sometimes, in loneliness she felt a certain ray of hope and longed to wait for him to return as it was only four years since he left and he said of waiting for five years! Again, like thunder the flashes of memory used to break the hope of Ramya, when she remembered how every time the serious or emotional situations have been treated by him as a joke. She was a girl with a modern outlook, she never believed in waiting! She was also sure that Arjun too, is a man with such an outlook. When she found Ravi approaching her parents for her hand, she readily accepted. Her wedding went with great pomp and show. She glittered like a queen and was shinning with happiness. But, a certain kind of emptiness prevailed within her heart. She was the only person aware for the emptiness. But, after marriage, her career, Ravi and life never allowed her to look back. Within a couple of years she became a mother of a beautiful daughter. Her daughter was the mirror image of her! Within five years of marriage, Ramya had settled as a happy woman. She started her new boutique of her own and also helped her husband in his business and at home she was a proud mother of Sarah and Rishi- the impression and a permanent mark of love between her and Ravi. It’s been more than nine years since she last saw Arjun. Now, whenever Ramya thinks about him, she forgets her with a smile. He has taken a permanent place in her heart with his saying, “Relax, Iam joking”. She sometimes stole time from her happening life and smiled to herself remembering her past life and about her silly love which never materialized. She realized it was not the true love. She was only infatuated towards hi. It was the sheer ignorance of his towards her that attracted her more!

Ravi surprised Ramya along with Sarah and Rishi on their sixth anniversary by planning a trip to the US. Initially, the utterance of the name struck Ramya and in the deepest corner she felt a knock on the door of her heart, as she knew Arjun lived there. She expected to meet his family too. For her, family meant wife and children.

As planned they left. She reached and went throughout the country and enjoyed thoroughly. One morning in San Francisco, it was Sarah,s fourth birthday, for which Ravi had planned a cute surprise for their daughter. He drove to the place before and asked Ramya to get the children later. As planned, she took her children and was walking through the aisle of the hotel, when a known voice called her name. She turned back to get surprised herself. It was Arjun. He looked matured, and more attractive than before. His jeans and T-shirt have been markedly replaced by a well-fit tailored suit and his green converse has eloped and in its place shinning boots made him look dignified. She kept looking at him, speechless. He came upto her and greeted her. She suddenly came back to senses and cordially smiled, as she has done when first she met him in the classroom. He looked down to see two innocent faces that resembled the beautiful face of Ramya. He knew it’s her children. He bent down and greeted them. She started bombarding him with questions about his whereabouts for all these years. He kept silent and then replied, “I was her only Ramya, it’s you who went away” Ramya did not understand, she wanted to get the burden of her secret love out of her heart. So she, unhesitatingly revealed to him about her old feelings and blamed him for never understanding it. He was silent. May be, he never hoped to hear such things, since he always took ramya as a close friend. But, to Ramya’s astonishment he told her, “I had asked you to wait for five years Ramya, but you didn’t” Ramya, felt her whole world vanishing and she lonely amidst it. She replied, ”But, I thought you were joking as usual”, to this Arjun said, “No, Ramya I was not!” Tears started rolling down her cheeks she forgot all her present life and felt the pain in her heart. He just kept his hand on her shoulder and said, “Relax, but I was not joking”. Arjun walked away leaving Ramya shocked forever!